you know he's gonna break your heart, but you just can't stay away

I've always felt that Nights in Rodanthe was the most heartbreaking Nicholas Sparks novel I've read, with At First Sight battling a close second. And while all of his books are great, I felt that his last few books lack.. Substance. I can remember reading Safe Haven and feeling a bit disappointed when I finished it. It was just.. Boring. There, I said it. I found a Nicholas Sparks novel that bored me to the point that I was willing to stop reading it. The only thing that got me going was the fact that I hate leaving books unfinished.

Usually, when a new Sparks novel has been released, I always get a copy and start reading at once. This time, though, I delayed getting a copy until I ran out of books to read.

The Best of Me, however, didn't disappoint as I thought it would. The story started simply: small-town high school sweethearts, a rich girl-poor guy thing, that didn't work out. Both led separate lives, until a circumstance forced both of them to come back to their hometown. The past caught up to them, blah blah blah, then comes the unfortunate twist that would break all the readers' hearts.

THE BEST OF ME is the heart-rending story of two small-town former high school sweethearts from opposite sides of the tracks. Now middle-aged, they've taken wildly divergent paths, but neither has lived the life they imagined . . . and neither can forget the passionate first love that forever altered their world. When they are both called back to their hometown for the funeral of the mentor who once gave them shelter, they will be forced to confront the choices each has made, and ask whether love can truly rewrite the past.

From FantasticFiction

The thing about Sparks' novels is that, halfway through the book, I'd already get this nagging feeling that it won't end well, but I'd still harbor that small sliver of hope that every thing is going to be fine, that love will prevail, and there's a happy ending for everyone. Maybe that's why it hurts so much. Because that hope, along with my heart, is crushed with the tragedy tragedies that befell the characters.

I started the book around midnight, thinking I'd read several chapters before I head on to bed and I ended up staying up till 5 in the morning trying to finish the book. When I finally went to bed, it was already daylight out, and I have this whopper of a headache from crying and lack of sleep - not a very good combo, I might add. And all the while I was reading, my subconscious is already mapping out what it thinks is gonna happen, and I'm like, "No, no. Please, no." Which led to more tears after because even though I know there's no happy ending there, I was hoping for something a little less heartbreaking.

But I guess that's the beauty of Sparks' novels - because it's not your typical sappy love story where the guy gets the girl at the end. It is real life, wherein sometimes, love just isn't enough. Not just romance, not just the good parts, but also the hardships and struggles in between.

Nicholas Sparks will be in Manila at the end of the month. I'm hoping I could attend his book signing, maybe meet him and shake his hand, and inform him that I'm suing him for breaking my heart over and over again.

I'm reading the book again. Masochist much? Damn.

not so secret secrets

It's been quiet lately. I've been doing nothing but sit at our store (business is slow, so I have a lot of time to kill till closing) and read. I did a little re-reading of some of my favorite books, seeing as I have nothing better to do.

I went to Cebu with the BF last week. I brought some stuff I need for my boarding house. I'm moving in with my bestfriend (hopefully) next month, and I still have a lot to transport/buy. The priority being a bed, else I'd be sleeping on the floor.

We arrived Friday night. We didn't do much, just hang out with a couple of friends. On Saturday, we went to SM, then to Ayala, looking for a pair of Nike slippers his brother wanted. We watched the movie The Change-Up, and it was fun. Especially since Denise had to ask a stranger if she could use his cellphone and text us, because her phone's battery was empty. It was epic. Then Kenj caught up with us and we played at Timezone for a while before heading to Teriyaki Boy for dinner. We then spent the rest of the night at Bo's, just talking, because we never seem to run out of stories to tell.

Saturday, I met with my bestfriend so I could show her where the boarding house is located, and we spent a long time chatting and catching up. Then we went to SM where BF and I killed some time before heading to the port. We arrived home around 10 that night.

It wasn't much of a vacation, but it was the first time we went out of town together, just the two of us. ♥

On another note, I saw this on Nikolett's blog, Better Than Coffee, last month. I've been meaning to do this, but I got sidetracked. I guess I'll start now. I'll do it backwards, though. Let's start from 10.

Ten secrets. Wow, this is tough. Secrets are supposed to be just that - secrets. And now that I have to list not only one, but ten of them, I can't seem to think of any.

*Now, these aren't exactly secrets. More like facts wherein only a handful of people know. In no particular order.

1. I learned how to swim when my cousin threw me into the sea while we were at a floating cottage.
2. I wanted to be a Psychologist so bad, that whenever my friends tell me about their problems, sometimes I ask them, "And how do you feel about that?"
3. I'm scared of large bathrooms.
4. Fish kept dying on me, I don't know why. I tried several times to have goldfishes as pets, but no matter what I do, they never last more than a month.
5. Christmas songs make me happy. So much that sometimes I listen to them even during the summer.
   
6. I love bargains and discount sale. I mean, who doesn't? I couldn't resist buying stuff (most of which I don't need) whenever I see them on sale. That's why my room always has clutter, because I have plenty of stuff I don't need or use.
   
7. I got high on paint once. Not intentionally, though. I wouldn't want anyone to think I'm an addict. LOL. I painted my room for hours and I guess all the paint fumes went straight to my brain.
8. Whenever I'd remember something funny, I'd laugh. Alone.
9. I'm a crier. Not in public, though. But books, movies, and sometimes seeing a friend cry can make me cry, too.
10. When I was a kid, I used to sleep in our living room while my Dad was watching TV just so he'd carry me to my bedroom.
    

kindle craze

Lately, Amazon released a bunch of new Kindles. Usually, whenever a newer version of whatever gadget I own is released, I'd develop this sudden need want for that newer version. I'd beat myself up for buying it a few months earlier, and lament the fact that my Mom wouldn't like it if I sell it to buy the newer one.

But for some reason, this time, I prefer my Kindle WiFi (called Kindle Keyboard now) to the new ones. I'd list my reasons, but for now, I want to introduce to you guys my pimped up Kindle. I bought a skin online, and it arrived today. At first I was kinda hesitant to put the skin myself, because I kept thinking about how I might mess it up, but it was surprisingly easy to apply. I also bought a cool, clip-on booklight called Kandle II.

Not my first choice, but this design is also nice.

Back view. I love the way the white flowers contrast with the red background =)

My Kandle II. Because I like reading in the middle of the night. =)
This is the design that I first chose, but it's out of stock.
I really wanted this one, but when I asked, they don't have this skin.
So I settled for their stocks.

Now, going back to the newly-released Kindles, there are 3 new ones available.

First, we have the Kindle WiFi 6". Among the three released, I like this one best. Not only is this smaller and lighter than my Kindle Keyboard, it's also cheaper. What I don't like, however, it that it has a smaller memory (only 2GB compared to my 4GB), and it has a shorter battery life. It has a virtual keyboard, but I prefer the actual keyboard because I arranged my books by collections, and it's easier to type using the actual keyboard than a virtual one.

Second, there's the Kindle Touch. As the name implies, this has a multi-touch function. Same battery life and same memory as my Kindle Keyboard, but I'm not much of a touchscreen person. I'm very much obsessive-compulsive, and I hate seeing fingerprints on any surface. Even with a screen protector, I'd be rubbing the screen with a cloth just to get read of telltale signs of fingerprints. So obviously, this one's so not for me.

And lastly, the one almost everyone wants: the Kindle Fire. It's colored, it's touchscreen, you can enjoy your magazines in full-color, you can watch movies, play games, listen to music, and browse the web. What's not to like? It can do all that, and you can read your favorite books, too! It's like this all-around tablet you can carry wherever you go. So what's the deal?

I compare it with the Kindle I own, and I was all like, my Kindle Keyboard's better than that. I mean, yes, the Fire has a lot of amazing features, but for me, it just messes with the fact that Kindles are supposed to be eBook readers. I prefer mine, because it's simple and fairly easy to use. And I chose a Kindle because I want to be able to read a book wherever and whenever I wanted to without having to lug around a number of paperbacks. If I wanted a tablet, I would have accepted my Mom's offer of a Galaxy Tab, instead of declining it and settling for a meager Kindle. Plus, of course, my Kindle has a longer battery life. Well, duh!

Anyway, to each his (or her, in my case) own. Although nothing beats the feel of reading an actual book, an eReader is actually nice to have. It's like a library one can carry all around. I never regretted getting a Kindle, and I wouldn't trade mine for anything else. ♥

managed a haircut without hyperventilating

I am well-known as always having my long hair, well, long. It's always been halfway down to my waist, or longer than that. Never shorter. I've been blessed with really thick, usually-wavy-sometimes-straight hair, and if I get it cut short, it goes poofy all of a sudden, especially with the weather here in the Philippines.

I started growing my hair long when I was in fifth grade; before that, I never had any say in how I want my hair to be. I grew up with my Aunt and Uncle (my Mom stayed in Manila to work, but that's a story for another day), and she preferred my hair short. How I hated it! I blessed the day when I was able to grow my hair the way I wanted to. That's part of the reason why I kept my hair long, another reason is that I think I look prettier with long hair, than with a short one.

I always need to give myself a pep talk whenever I get my hair trimmed. Cut away 2 inches or more, and I'd have mild panic attacks. And I just can't stand seeing my precious hair on the floor.

That's why my Mom was shocked to see me when I came home from the salon yesterday. I told her I was getting a haircut, and she expected me to do my usual trim. So I can imagine her surprise when she saw how short my hair was.

I had it cut to a semi-layer style, brushing just below my shoulders. Now, for some people that might already be considered long, but for me, that's just short. I never regretted getting it cut, though. My hair grows so fast, it'll be back to it's usual length before I know it!

Last May. We joined the locals for a Taebo session when we vacationed in Beijing =)
I had my hair trimmed when I got home.

Just last month, when Jen & I went to Cebu.

Shorter than usual. =)

My precious hair. =(

high school never ends

My high school Alma Mater recently celebrated it's 90th founding anniversary, and alumni from all over came home to attend the celebration. So it's a given that some of my high school classmates, the ones who aren't here, all came home for a vacation.

We are a close batch, and we know almost all our school mates. In a school where every level only has one section, with 30-40 students per level, it's hard to keep your distance. And most of my classmates, we've been together since our Nursery/Kinder days, up until we've graduated high school. I've heard of schools where the sections range from 2 sections up to around 20 or so, but I've never experienced it. That's why when I went to college, I think I was a bit culture shocked over the number of students in our year.

This past week, I've been doing nothing but hanging out with my best buds in high school, having a lot of catching up to do. It's like we're compensating for the time we weren't together. I mean, it's really hard to get together when we've all got separate lives, what with work, school, and raising children. So we make do with whatever time we have, and make the most of it.

It's been fun, really fun. We ate out, hang at each other's houses, went on gimiks, watch DVDs, sang videoke, went wall-climbing, got drunk.

Yes, for the first time in my entire life, I got really drunk. I'm not much of a drunker. Usually, when I'm with friends, I just drink one bottle or one to two shots of whatever it is they're drinking (except beer; I can't stand the smell of beer). Enough to get them off my back for not drinking. But this time, OMG, I still can't believe we all got drunk in the middle of the afternoon. We were at my couz June's house, and we were doing videoke. Not good, I might add. Somehow when God gave out talents, we were sleeping or something, coz we never got them. That was also the day Pedring was wreaking havoc over Luzon, so.. =D

Anyway, my couz bought two bottles of The Bar, and although we keep telling her how strong it is, she kept saying it's OK. We told her to mix it with something, and while she mixed it with juice, it was still potent enough to scramble our brains, which is what happened.

Gos, we were so funny. Not that I remember much, the details are all fuzzy. I do remember Lei sprawled on the floor, June & I hacking each other's FB and laughing so hard I thought I'd stop breathing and die, and Shyn saying some thing and laughing with us. I remember belting out Like A Virgin, and Shyn singing sad love songs in tribute to her love life. I remember Lei singing Beer, and all of us singing along to the first line: "Nais kong magpakalasing.." I remember June choosing a song called Radio Ga Ga, and singing it but not really knowing the song, she ended up reading and rapping it, with the three of us clutching our tummies and laughing so hard.

It was a really crazy afternoon. We started drinking around 3, and around past 5 we were already bordering the thin line between tipsy and drunk.I don't even remember how we managed to go up the stairs to June's room that night. One minute we were singing downstairs, the next minute we were all up and lying down on her bed, fighting nausea and trying to make it to the bathroom to puke. Not our finest moment, for sure.

We laid in bed, and tried to sleep it off for a while. Then June did her nail art stuff, and gave us pretty nails. We then tried to shake off the lingering effects of our alcohol intoxication by talking about stuffs - love live, sex life, high school life, the future. Then Lei, Shyn and I went home around 11.

I've got the Panda nails =)

I woke up with a killer hangover the next day, and I told myself that would be the only time I'm ever gonna get drunk, but hey, I don't make promises I can't keep. My friend Jin is hell-bent on getting me drunk before I'm married, not that I'm getting married soon.

But despite all the nausea, the puking, the numbness, the hangover, I'd never trade that night for any other. ♥

recently read - september 2011

Because there's nothing I love doing more.. =)

• The Perfect Play (Jaci Burton)
• Changing The Game (Jaci Burton)
• The Bride Collector (Ted Dekker)
• Boneman's Daughters (Ted Dekker)
• I Shot You Babe (Leslie Langtry)
• Mad, Bad, and Blonde (Cathie Linz)
• Luck Be A Lady(Cathie Linz)
• The Wedding Girl (Madeleine Wickham)
• Too Hot To Touch (Louisa Edwards)
• The Peach Keeper (Sarah Addison Allen)
• New York To Dallas (JD Robb)
• Serendipity (Carly Phillips)
• Mischief Becomes Her (Kasey Michaels)
• Chasing Perfect (Susan Mallery)
• Almost Perfect (Susan Mallery)
• Finding Perfect (Susan Mallery)
• Only Mine (Susan Mallery)
• Only Yours (Susan Mallery)
• Only His (Susan Mallery)

recently read - august 2011

• Glitter Baby (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Fancy Pants (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• First Lady (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Call Me Irresistible (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Breathing Room (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• It Had to Be You (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Natural Born Charmer (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Nobody's Baby But Mine (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• This Heart of Mine (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Match Me If You Can (Susan Elizabeth Philips)
• Guys & Dogs (Elaine Fox)
• Beware of Doug (Elaine Fox)
• Bedtime for Bonsai (Elaine Fox)
• My One and Only (Kristan Higgins)
• The Next Best Thing (Kristan Higgins)
• True Love and Other Disasters (Rachel Gibson)
• Any Man of Mine (Rachel Gibson)
• In Bed With the Devil (Lorraine Heath)
• Between the Devil and Desire (Lorraine Heath)
• Surrender to the Devil (Lorraine Heath)
• Midnight Pleasures With a Scoundrel (Lorraine Heath)
• Passions of a Wicked Earl (Lorraine Heath)
• Pleasures of a Notorious Gentleman (Lorraine Heath)
• Just Like Heaven (Julia Quinn)
• Code Name: Nanny (Christina Skye)
• Code Name: Princess (Christina Skye)
• The Darkest Hour (Maya Banks)
• No Place to Run (Maya Banks)
• Hidden Away (Maya Banks)
• Sweet Surrender (Maya Banks)
• Sweet Persuasion (Maya Banks)
• Sweet Seduction (Maya Banks)
• Sweet Temptation (Maya Banks)

it's a go!

The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Because somewhere in between brownies and choco chip pancakes, my Dad said YES! OMG, I've been waiting for this, and I'm so glad I now have his permission. Although, granted I would go for it, whether or not I have his permission. I was about to ask Ate Juliet, a good friend of our family, how to get a loan. She works at Insular Life and handles our insurance plans, and she told me once about their loan policies.

Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm gonna backtrack a little.

Ever since I was a little girl, my Mom would let me help in the kitchen, although I don't think I'm much of a help that time. And ever since I learned how to make my way in the kitchen, I've always known that I wanted to be a chef. But college got in the way, and when my Mom won't let me take up Psychology or Journalism and I ended up in Nursing, my cooking has taken a backseat. Sometime during the middle of my first year, I asked my Mom if I could shift from Nursing to Culinary Arts. She refused. But she promised me that if I finish Nursing first, she'd pay for my Culinary after college, if I still want it.

But halfway thru college, I decided to pursue Medicine, and become a doctor. Well, that didn't happen, which suck, but I'm over it now. I know I would have been an awesome doctor, though. So, it's their loss, whoever they are.

Which now comes to this. I did 6 months as a nurse volunteer, and while I did enjoy the work, despite how tiring it is, I just don't see myself being a nurse for the rest of my life. I don't think I received the calling from Florence Nightingale. And that led me to reflect on my life so far. I tried to think of a work/business that would profit, but also something that I would enjoy, and I circled back to my first love: food.

I love to eat, but more importantly, I love to cook. Or rather, bake. It started as a hobby, and became my major stress reliever while I was at school. Now, I'm hoping it can be more.

So.. I'm going to enroll at the Philippine School of Culinary Arts. Hopefully, after 10 months, I'll become a full-fledged Pastry Chef. *fingers crossed* My Mom supported me from the time I told her about my plans, but my Dad had some misgivings. Probably because the school is at Cebu, and this will be the first time I'm gonna be away from home for a long time, but he finally said yes! And OMG, but I'm just bubbling with happiness.

Sometime next week, I'm going back to Cebu to get a city health card as part of the requirements, enroll, and find a place to live. I'm so excited!

I was bored earlier to day so I decided to make brownies and chocolate chip pancakes as our late-afternoon snack.

The brownie batter.

Brownies! Fresh from the oven. =)

Pancake batter. It's not much to look at, but it's yummy! I like the batter better than the cooked pancake!
I don't know why it rotates to this position everytime I upload it, though.

Teflon pans. The best kitchen tool, ever. This rotates, too. I wonder why.

Chocolate chip pancakes ♥

Pancakes and brownies together. =)

the queen city of the south

Cebu is just a 30-minute plane ride, a 4-hour van/fast craft ride, or a 6-hour van/slow boat ride from Tacloban, you'd think I'd be going there as frequent as I can, but no. I live so close to Cebu, but I've only been there a handful of times, and the first time I did, I was in second-year high school already.

I remember feeling a bit burned out in my last year of college that I begged my Mom for a short trip, just a change of environment to settle me down, and we went to Cebu for a bit of downtime, and a lot of shopping. And sometime during February last year, I accompanied my Dad for a conference, and I caught up with friends while he attended it. That was the time my Dad bought me an iPod Touch, as a gift for me for passing the Nursing Licensure Exam.

My longest stay in Cebu, though, was during my third year in college, when we affiliated at the Vicente Sotto Memorial Medical Center for our Psych duty. Now, that was fun! I love my patient. He was a schizophrenic, but he was fun to talk to in his lucid days.

Anyway, the reason I'm rambling about Cebu was because I just had a mini-vacation there. My main reason for going was because I wanted to see the culinary school I was setting my sights into, and I had some inquiries. Of course, seeing my friends and doing some shopping are added bonuses. I also got to meet my Mom's BFF and my former yaya, Ate Memie, along with his son Michael.

French fries break with Jen, Ate M, and Michael =)

Jenny and I arrived at Cebu on the 2nd of September, and Jojo joined us on the 5th. It was a fun-filled week, and we got to do a little bit of shopping. I got myself a pair of shoes, 3 shirts, a pair of shorts, an Angry Birds keychain, and a pair of Angry Birds flip-flops. Usually I'd take a picture and post them, but this time, I kinda forgot, and I don't want to postpone this blog post any longer, so never mind the pictures.

My new pair of comfy flats ♥

I got BF these, though. He's not much of an HP fan, but I am.
And they don't have female sizes of the shirt, so if I can't wear it, then I'd rather he did. =)

While waiting for Jojo to finish fitting his choice of shirts.

Jojo and Jin watched Zombadings: Patayin sa Shokot si Remington, and while they did, I walked around the mall, and bought the things my Mom asked me to. I didn't watch, because I seldom watch Filipino movies at the cinema (yes, I know, I don't support the Filipino movie industry, blah blah blah). After all that walking, I decided to have a bit of rest, so I went in search of my favorite FroYo store, The White Hat. And that was where they caught up to me after the movie.

Pizza Hut for dinner that night. Lasagna and mozzarella sticks. Yum ♥

And this is completely off-topic, but I just have to remember the time I bonded with my Sigaw Sisters Krissy, Kaiye, and Grace at The White Hat. Those were good times.

When are we doing this again? ♥

What we did in Cebu are all random,and I don't think I'll be writing down everything the happened. Those were the highlights. I know I had fun, my friends had fun, and that's all that matters.

I'll end it with this, though: Jin and I finally got over our Teriyaki Boy cravings!

Chicken Teriyaki ♥

Jen lost her space to Cookie Monster!

At the airport. Our last meal together before we went separate ways. Me to Tacloban, Jen to Manila.

packing my stuff early for a change

One more night, and it's Hello, Cebu! My flight doesn't leave till 5 in the afternoon, and usually I prefer packing at the last minute, around 2 hours before I have to leave for the airport, but this time I decided to pack early, just so I won't have to do anything else tomorrow.

My friend Jen and I are off to Cebu tomorrow for a week-long trip. It's mostly vacay, and meeting up with friends who are there, but I have some stuff to see to, too. Hopefully, if all goes well, I can finally tell ask my Dad about my Pastry Arts plans. *fingers crossed*

I'm excited about this trip, even though I don't have much money, and by the time I come home I'll be virtually broke, because I'll be seeing my best friend again after 6 years. That's a really long time, but still, our friendship remains strong. We've known each other since our elementary days, became best friends in our high school years, and maintained that friendship to this day. I can't wait to see her, and I do hope she can bring her little girl Yzabelle (Yza, as she's called, but I prefer calling her Belle, so we'd share the same name), since she's the only inaanak (goddaughter) I have that I haven't seen yet.

I love promo flights. It allows me to travel whenever I want without thinking how expensive flying can be. Mind you, it is still expensive, but considering the original ticket price, it's a steal.

I can't wait! =)