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Monday, July 5, 2010

going all toxic


"Toxic" is a term most medical professionals (here in the Philippines, I don't know about other countries) use when we're bombarded with a huge workload, difficult patients, difficult patient's relatives, a patient with lots of complications, a very busy shift, etc. Students also use it if their clinical instructors give them a hard time, if they are assigned to patients hooked to a lot of contraptions, patients whose charts are filled with doctor's orders, or if they are busy with schoolwork.

In my case, I say my life is currently toxic, because I feel so tired all the time. My head's been bothering me for days, and I can't get as much sleep as I want. This critical care course is taking up all my time - it's like being back to school, only worse. We've got around 43 topics squeezed into a 3-week time frame. We have a midterm after 10 days, and a finals after the 3-week lecture. We have journal reading and case studies. Then a 4-week clinical exposure in different ICUs.

Add all that to my recurrent headache, I feel as though the world is slowly sucking the life out of me. I'm so freaking tired, and I can't even complain, because other people have it worse than me. I can't even go to the mall on weekdays (and TriNoma is so freaking near!) because even though we finish around 4, sometimes earlier, mostly later, the only thought I have as I slowly walk home (our apartment is only a 10-minute walk from PHC) is to curl up in bed and sleep. I don't even have much of an appetite, which is shockingly so not me. And I can't afford to lose any pounds since I don't have much to spare (no matter how much and how often I eat, I can't seem to gain weight).

I'm trying as hell to keep my eyes open while I scrounge the World Wide Web for another journal article (I need one more) but it's hard. Damn! Those people should stop being selfish and publish all those articles for free. I can't afford to pay for them, dammit!

I am so frustrated right now.

9 comments:

tapyboy said...

Don't know about what topic ur looking but try searching for free journals here at http://www.freemedicaljournals.com/


tapyboy
http://medrelatedstudents.blogspot.com

Belle ♥ said...

hey, thanks tapyboy!

李李淑博淑林嘉宏真 said...

It takes all kinds to make a world.............................................................

雲亨雲亨雲亨 said...

人有兩眼一舌,是為了觀察倍於說話的緣故。............................................................

chen said...

上來逛逛,踩個腳印給你~~~..................................................

雲亨雲亨雲亨 said...

朋友是一面鏡子............................................................

嘉雯 said...

blog有留言互動才好玩~~希望留言能支持您的更新動力!!!............................................................

俊坤俊坤 said...

真正仁慈的人,會忘記他們做過的善行,他們全心投入現在的工作,過去的事已被遺忘。..................................................

洪瑋婷洪瑋婷 said...

Man is not made for defeat. A mean can be destroyed but not defeated..................................................................